How do you work on bringing your marriage back to ';normal';?

My husband can be a workaholic! He might work 7 days a week one week and some weeks he'll have off a few days. We go nuts trying to figure out what we're going to do. Back in the old days (2 yrs. ago) we used to be able to enjoy ourselves just by sitting at home doing nothing. Now it seems we're looking to get out more and we have a baby, so that doesn't help.





He has lost all intimacy and he isn't very open with his emotions/ feelings. He changed a lot since we had our daughter in November. I just want to go back closer to that honeymoon stage of marriage. I've only been married for two years, but lately, married life isn't as enjoyable.





When you feel your marriage becoming a separation, not a unity, what do you do? (and I'm not talking counseling, what can the couple do?)How do you work on bringing your marriage back to ';normal';?
Having children changes a marriage. I am not saying it's right, I am just telling you how it is. Your husband was use to being the #1 person in your life. Now the baby comes first. They don't understand motherhood. They don't understand that when that baby cries how it makes you feel. Also having a baby limits where you can go and what you can do. One of things that you could do is to get a baby sitter on his days off and go do something just the two of you. He loves the baby but he just doesn't want to hear about every goo goo and dah dah or how many times the kids had his/her diapers changed that day. Maybe he is not as intimate as he use to be becuase he finds it hard to compete with the baby. You need to think of the things you did together that were funa nd made you happy and how you both felt when you first fell in love and how and why you got together in the first place. Then you need to bring some of those days back. Get a baby sitter and go have some fun like you use to before the baby. When you do go do things together without the baby, make him feel like he is #1 again. Talk about how your life has changed since the baby and ask him for some input on how you can still keep the intimacy in your lives and raise a family. If he is feeling this way about this baby, I would think really hard about having any more. Part of the reason he has become a workaholic is because he doesn't like being at home. Make sure that at least 3 nights a week when he comes home that the baby is in bed for the night and he has all of your attention.How do you work on bringing your marriage back to ';normal';?
write down what you used to do and plan your next ';current'; event accordingly. It's hard when you put kids in the mix. and for him to work 7 days....WOW. Get a sitter for 1 day, and ask him to take a day off (plan in advance). And do something romantic.
What you are going through is normal. Most married couples get to that point where the newness is gone and reality sets in that things are just not like they were when you first met. Well...thats when you have to ';choose'; to love that person. Love is a choice...and yes its not easy to keep trying when things are not going so well and life is weighing down on you. So...why dont you make the first move and try to bring the sparks back into your relationship. The next time he comes home be waiting for him in some sexy lingerie...dont come to the door and meet him...let him find you and then pull him into the bedroom and seduce him. Thats a suggestion....that would definitely surprise me and get me going...
Well first you need to tell him how you feel and that things need to change now. You need to set aside time and find a sitter. And I told my workaholic husband that he better start looking for a new job because couples get divorced all the time for that reason. I'm tired of being the in-home sitter/cook/maid, stuck in the house until he can get home to relieve me of my sitter/cook/maid duty.





I've told him time and time again, and at first he would get really pissed (and I would not say it in a confrontational way, but ';matter-of-fact'; like), but now he is realizing that it's causing problems for his life too (you'd think that your marriage should've made you realize that). So now he is looking for a new job.





Oh, it also helped that I started leaving everytime he was home (the gym, shopping), and then he missed me and got mad that I was gone all the time. (????!!!!)
Marriages go through ups and downs. It is how you deal with those times that makes all the difference in the years. My husband and I love to do a mix of both staying at home and going out. We have 2 kids and we sometimes get babysitters or we plan an outing with the kids. Anything that you can do to increase time with each other and give yourselves a chance to laugh and have fun is good. Children change your dynamic and often our priorities, but we still need to have time together. Intimacy is created on moments where 2 people learn to communicate on different levels and find enjoyment out of the times they have.